Friday, April 09, 2010

Suffering

Sam has been so sick lately.  He is not eating.  When one child suffers, the whole family suffers.  I have cried my eyes out over this child a hundred times.

One new conviction today was, if I would really behold and believe how big God is, and recognize even a fraction of His glorious power, this issue with Sam would seem so small.  It is a problem of unbelief, a problem of being unable to release him to God.  My vision of God is far too small, my vision of earth far too big.  How can I rest if I do not trust?  I can only believe with the faith that He gives, and so I ask, please Lord, give me more faith, help my unbelief. 

I certainly love comfort more than Jesus, and suffering will definitely help remedy that!  And that is a blessing!  Thank you Lord for not leaving me cold and lifeless in my comfort, and my small vision of You.

My prayer must change from “ take away this pain!” to, “MORE of You Jesus, give me more of Yourself.”

IMG_8075                                  Not feeling so great.

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